


Joy's brief spring

by Sneakend



Series: westward to the sea [1]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Alabasta Arc, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Ensemble Cast, F/F, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Loguetown Arc (One Piece), M/M, Multi, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, Platonic Soulmates, Pre-Time Skip, Romantic Soulmates, Soul Bond, Telepathic Bond, Telepathy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-15
Updated: 2019-08-27
Packaged: 2019-10-28 12:44:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17787644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sneakend/pseuds/Sneakend
Summary: Luffy's hand finds Zoro's bigger, calloused one and holds on. It's a firm grip, grounding and growing more familiar by the day.Usopp eyes them suspiciously, "you guys are acting seriously strange.""They're bonded, so get used to it," Nami declares with a sense of finality."Bonded? Like true love, soulmates bonded?" His voice rises to a pitch."Yeah, that," grunts Zoro, still holding Luffy’s hand and maintaining eye contact with Usopp, challenging him to go on."But… you're both guys."





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Here's something I wrote last year. This first part in the series was only supposed to be a prequel to what I really wanted to write about but it became longer than expected. Uses an uneven mix of anime and manga canon.

We all are connected to other people through bonds forged in different hearths. Some are platonic, some romantic, and some, perhaps, fluid and flexible enough to transform from one type to the other - while some are so brittle they rapidly crumble to dust in the face of adversity. These are things that everyone almost unconsciously acknowledges, and most of the bonds remain in existence through the shared agreement of the individuals involved - a friendship or a marriage can be terminated easily enough.

It is a grand delusion that a bond between two people is something shared. A mother loves her child, that is true most of the time, but that is a one-way bond, often formed long before the child is born. Eventually, when the child learns to love, a new bond is formed. And so it is with all relationships. Two lovers don't always fall in love simultaneously, two friends can feel for each other with different intensity - and never know that one of them is more invested. In normal circumstances, it is impossible to be truly certain of how another person feels. This is why people need to affirm their relationships not just through deeds, but words as well. _You're my friend. You're my brother. I love you._ What it comes down to, in the end, is the choice and ability to trust the other person and the willingness to take a risk, even if it opens one to being hurt.  
  
But in all the four seas and beyond, it is known that some rare, extraordinary people are capable of more. A genuine two-way bond. A bond where no words are needed, for feelings flow freely through, unmasked and true. In these, there is no choice involved and the termination of a bond like this comes at the cost of one's life. Often stories of such things are connected to legends and fairy tales more so than actual people - for this ability is so rare one could sail the seas for a lifetime and never meet someone who's personally experienced it. No, most often one hears it whispered amidst gossip of famous figures a regular citizen is unlikely to ever meet - yet seems to know everything about.  
  
"I heard that Sengoku is soulbonded to Garp!" shared enthusiastically at the fish market and answered with, "to Garp? Everybody knows he's bonded to a goat."  
  
As for children, their first introduction to the concept usually comes through tales like _The Three Deaths of Princess Yuusui_ told at bedtime by loving parents who'll sometimes look at each other and think, _maybe I, too, could’ve had that, with someone else_.  
  
It is the sort of romantic notion many chase after in their youth before, disillusioned, settling for something less. Often that something ends up being not so bad after all, but in the corner of their mind people retain that idea of _I could've had more_. In this sense, it is perhaps more of a burden to know about such things. And many who are more acquainted with the subject would go as far as to say these bonds are not only a curse upon all humankind but especially the individuals who are capable of forming them. Though such unions are seen by many as true undying love, they leave no room for privacy or free will. Once the bond is formed, it stays. You don't choose it, it chooses you. And though it may give its participants almost supernatural advantages, they are easily overshadowed by the drawbacks. Sure, one will never be alone, will be able to communicate across great distances and will always be able to find their partner - even without a vivre card. Moreover, platonic soulmates, especially, have been known to fight as one, in a way so synchronized as to be nigh unbeatable. But the bond is strange and entrancing, easy to get lost in. The strongest ones are almost like beings of their own, ready to consume, they pull and pull, until the pull of the real world seems but a distant echo and all that matters is you - except you aren't really you anymore and they aren't them, you're both more and less than before, something different and something not meant to be.  
  
Most of this, however, remains a mystery to Luffy for a very long time. He has no interest in romantic tales, at least not the kind concerning princesses, and he has no one who'd tell them to him anyway. He doesn't read books and forgets what little gossip he comes across, happy to live in the moment and dream bigger dreams. He'll learn, later, but like with most truly important things, he learns through living rather than theory, even if the theory could help him understand. He's never been good with things like that, things that require complicated thinking, but with help from others, anything is possible. This, he comes to learn as well.  
  
He grows up watching his brothers move so much faster, so much steadier than him. They're older, had a head start in life - it seems impossible to reach them in skill. Therefore, he's determined to outdo them in willpower if nothing else. They move through life as one, speaking silent words not meant for him, only reluctantly accepting him into their circle.

"You don't belong here," they tell him in the beginning, but the attitude fades and he's grateful because he'd rather they beat him up than leave him alone. It's a fear he always carries along and knows that even in this, he's alone. Ace and Sabo, they have figured out a secret, a way of bringing each other along no matter where they go. Luffy doesn't entirely understand it, even when they try to explain.  
  
"I can hear him inside my head," Ace tells him. "I know when he's hurt or hungry or sad."  
  
"And I," announces Sabo, proud, "know when he has to take a shit!"

This makes Luffy laugh out loud and Ace hit Sabo with a stick hard enough that in the end, it's both Sabo and Ace groaning in shared pain radiating back and forth through the bond.

  
It's something he wants, too. A more secret desire on par with his wish to become the pirate king. The latter he hollers to the world, proudly and confidently. The former he keeps close to his heart, quiet, where sometimes he thinks he can feel a gentle pull, like he needs to go to the sea, body and soul, and discover its secrets. And see where the pull leads him. For a long time, it's ignorable, more comforting than demanding and he forms bonds of his own with his brothers. Maybe he can't hear their thoughts, but he loves them all the same. To him, the bond they share is only different, not superior, and when they share cups of sake and officially declare themselves brothers, he's content in the knowledge that this three-way bond of theirs is unbreakable.

 

* * *

 

When he's seventeen, both Ace and Sabo long gone, the pull at his core becomes more demanding. Instead of soothing him to sleep at night - and often in the middle of the day too - it seems to be urging him on and asking, _what are you waiting for? Hurry up and come to me!_

There's nothing to keep him in Fuusha so he obeys. Using the pull as his guiding star he makes it to Shells Town with Coby in tow. But Luffy only has eyes for Zoro. The name echoes inside his mind and he knows, before he even sees him, that he's found what he's been looking for. If he thought about it, he might find it ironic - the fact that it's at a marine base where he first lays eyes on Zoro. But who'd have time for that when Zoro is right there, tied to a pole yet, somehow, radiating power and determination. Luffy could drink the sight in for hours, though he'd prefer to do it in private. However, the rescue mission proves unexpectedly complicated - Zoro has his pride, and refuses to be deterred by hunger or the threat of death. They end up fighting their way out and Luffy is laughing because he hadn't thought, not really, that one of his dreams would be realized quite so soon. And he couldn't have imagined how good it'd feel either.

He itches to be alone with Zoro, to fully revel in the possibility of _them_ \- and finally on their small boat with nothing but the night sky as their ceiling he's able to. He scoots next to Zoro, close enough that their shoulders touch, almost unbalancing the small boat with his eager movement. He cranes his neck, looks up at Zoro and grins, stupidly glad.

Zoro stares down at him, going for stern but only managing a vaguely neutral expression. "It's you, huh?" he observes, acknowledging for the first time that he knows precisely who Luffy is.

Luffy sniggers and throws an arm around Zoro's chest, an alarmed look flashing across his face for a second before he relaxes into the contact.

"Hey, Zoro?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I…" he doesn't know how to explain it, doesn't know if Zoro knows it can be done, even. He settles for, "can I go inside your head?"

And somehow Zoro seems to know, or instinctively guess, that it might indeed be possible. He doesn't question the plausibility of the notion, simply asks, "are you sure you know what you're doing?"

Luffy grins and firmly tells him, "nope!"

"What have I gotten myself into," mumbles Zoro, but inclines his head down so that their foreheads are touching.

Luffy is not sure if it's necessary, the gesture seems almost ritualistic for Zoro, but he basks in the physical contact and pours himself into Zoro's mind - just like that. It's wonder and warmth wrapped in a dose of loss and pain, but over everything else, it's something unique, a whole another person put together in such intricate ways no one could ever perfectly copy them. He doesn't know if there's training for this, only that he doesn't need it even if it exists, because this comes naturally to him. Naturally like fighting, and loving, and doing the right things. Really, it’s like pouring water into a cup except neither of them is the water or the cup, they are simply being poured into each other, being molded into the shape of the other until it’s impossible to say where one of them starts and the other ends.

Out there somewhere is the real world, but it doesn't matter here. Whereas Luffy's own mind has sometimes felt more like a prison than anything, sharing it with Zoro transforms it immediately into a home, a place he can cherish returning to, a place where someone is waiting specifically for him. It's something he doesn't have the right words for and, he thinks, maybe words haven't even been invented for it because in this place they're not needed. He's never been good with them, words. And from Zoro's mind to his he hears, _me neither_. It's amazing, enough to leave him breathless. Better than meat. _Meat?_ an inquiring thought from Zoro. But he finds his answer before Luffy has a chance to even thread together a reply - Luffy can sense his amused, _ah, I see_.

He wants to know everything there is to know about Zoro, wants to share everything about himself. He doesn't know how deep into another person he can delve, but he desperately wants to burrow within Zoro and never, ever leave. Zoro senses Luffy's desperation, of course, in this place where they share everything.

 _We have all the time in the world_ , a thought he sends Luffy's way, soothing, yet accompanied by a distant melancholy.

 _Who's Kuina?_ And Zoro tells him. Kuina, his fierce friend, a sister like Ace and Sabo are Luffy's brothers. A similar shared dream between siblings and best friends.

 _She was strong. Better than me_ , Zoro admits, almost proudly, though Luffy senses he'd been bitter about it when Kuina had still been alive.

 _Wish I could've met her_ , Luffy thinks, but it's almost like he _has_ met her - he knows her as well as Zoro does, now.

But he doesn't want to just take, and so he shows Zoro Shanks, _that's how I got this hat!_ and Ace and Sabo, _they're my brothers!_

 _Your brothers are bonded too?_ Zoro seems to find this is highly irregular.

 _Yeah, of course_. Apparently this is rare. Luffy feels himself being tugged further in, somewhere beyond conscious thought, just to be met with gentle resistance from Zoro.

 _We should separate_.

Luffy wants to protest but instead asks, _why?_

 _It's dangerous to go too deep or to stay for too long_.

_How do you know?_

_Doesn't everyone?_ Zoro inquires patiently.

 _I don't know how to get out_. It's not an excuse but the actual truth. As easy as it had been to enter Zoro's mind leaving doesn't seem like an option at all. There's no clear exit and he's already spread too wide, bits and pieces of his life scattered around and mixed with Zoro's so thoroughly he's not sure what he should bring along if he managed to return to himself. Maybe that thought should be scary but he can't find it in himself to be upset by it - there could be no better place to be trapped in the whole world. There's a small nudge from somewhere - from Zoro, he assumes - and he's dipped back into his own mind with a sudden, bewildering jolt that leaves his limbs shaky.

It takes him a while to realize that he's lying down on the wooden deck, staring up at the sky, having slid there from his original position. He blinks drowsily up, still feeling like he's only halfway back into his own mind. Zoro's hand on his shoulder startles him, but he lets himself be pulled up into a sitting position next to Zoro. It's better that way, and less chilly too, pressed close together. The stars are like beacons in the sky, guiding their way through the vast, dark sea at night - though Luffy is in no hurry to be guided anywhere. The world is out there, but it'll keep. For now, he's content to huddle close to Zoro on their precarious ship bobbing on the gentle waves, surrounded by the humming heat of the bond between them.

 

* * *

 

When Nami joins, it doesn't take her long to realize what's going on. But she's got a good head on her shoulders and takes it all in stride.

"I've heard of it, of course," she tells them. "But never met anyone with any first-hand experience."

She looks a bit wistful like she's distantly hoping for something fantastic but very unlikely; a hidden treasure of untold riches, perhaps. Luffy doesn't really understand why everyone treats this thing like it's a miracle when in his experience a lot of people are, in fact, capable of it. He tells as much to her, and Zoro's nodding along as if just a while ago he hadn't agreed with Nami.

"It's true," he says. "His brothers have it too."

Nami huffs a disbelieving laugh and aims a hard stare in their direction. "How would you know? Have you actually met them?"

Zoro just slowly shakes his head, less in disagreement and more in exasperation at Nami's ignorance. "He can't lie to me. So if he says it's true, then it's true."

Nami seems to ponder that but doesn't counter it with a comment, accepting that her own knowledge in the matter is lacking, most of it having come from books, which themselves often were second, or even third-hand accounts of the subject.

After that, she shows only marginal interest in the matter, which could either be from genuine lack of interest or respect for their privacy. Whichever it is, Luffy appreciates it. As most topics go, he’s not very good at explaining it especially since this one’s all very new to him as well. Well, both new and _not new_ , a fact that seems to pique her interest when it does come up.

"What do you mean, you've always had it?" She looks genuinely puzzled.

"Well," Luffy corrects himself, "not always, always. But for a long time!" It's not like he's marked the date on the calendar, not like he's ever owned a calendar, but he knows he had been young when it all started. Perhaps just after Sabo left them.

"Didn't you say you just met each other a while ago?" Nami really doesn't seem convinced, as if perhaps Luffy’s sense of time is just so screwed he thinks something like _two weeks_ equals _always_.

"We did!" Luffy says. "But he was pulling me. That's how I knew where to go." He says it as if it’s obvious that's how things work. How else would you find the person you're meant to be with?

"I was pulling?" Zoro exclaims in an incredulous tone. "It's you who was constantly tugging at my brain, I haven't had a decent night's sleep in years."

"I've never heard of anything like that," Nami says, frowning. "It's supposed to be a traumatic experience. Almost like a lightning strike or something."

"Oh, believe me, it _is_ traumatic," Zoro grumbles from where he's sitting, hugging his swords.

"No, but in all the stories it's always this… dramatic, life-changing moment. But you guys knew before you even met? It's weird."

"Stories are just stories," Zoro says, clearly not interested in the cross-examination. Luffy tends to agree. He doesn't care if it's normal or not because it's just like it's meant to be. Nami gives up and the topic doesn't really come up for a while, although she does seem fond of them and their closeness, her bad temper and violent manner almost always subdued when she as much as catches a glimpse of them together.

 

* * *

 

With Usopp, they gain a new crew member and an actual ship. It is an important, no, an essential step towards their goals and Luffy beams as they set sail for the next island. His happiness is always catching but especially so to Zoro who can’t avoid getting a dose of whatever Luffy is feeling poured straight into his mind. Left on his own devices, Zoro tends to be the more serious, silent type. Yet now he’s in a great mood, that much is evident. Luffy's hand finds Zoro's bigger, calloused one and holds on. It's a firm grip, grounding and growing more familiar by the day.

Usopp eyes them suspiciously, "you guys are acting seriously strange."

"They're bonded, so get used to it," Nami declares with a sense of finality.

"Bonded? Like true love, soulmates bonded?" His voice rises to a pitch.

"Yeah, that," grunts Zoro, still holding Luffy’s hand and maintaining eye contact with Usopp, challenging him to go on.

"But… you're both guys."

Nami bristles, looking like she's on a warpath or at least about to step on one. "What’s wrong with that?"

"Nothing!" Usopp raises his hands in surrender. "It's just that in the stories it's always some noble hero with their highborn ladylove… and two guys can't, you know…" his sentence dies before the end.

"You," Nami states viciously, "have been listening to the wrong stories."

Zoro isn’t any more amicable. "What is it that two guys can't do, Usopp?"

Luffy follows the discussion with interest. He feels bad for Usopp, being pitted against Nami and Zoro is very far from ideal, after all. But he also knows that there are things Usopp needs to understand and accept as soon as possible or there will be bigger issues later. Usopp seems to be grappling for the best way to express himself in a manner that won’t get him crucified by his new crew.

In a defeated tone he settles for, “have children.”

"Idiot! Soulbonds aren't for making babies, anyone can do that!" Nami says, not letting off even when Usopp's visibly deflated.

"What _are_ soulbonds for?" Luffy wonders out loud, his first contribution to the discussion.

Nami turns to him and opens her mouth, then closes it before settling on an answer. "They're for… important things. Important people. When you meet a bonded person you know they're destined for something big. Something greater than any single person could handle." Her eyes are suddenly alight with wonder as if she's recounting a beloved childhood tale.

 _Usopp's not the only one who's been listening to shitty stories_ , Zoro sends towards Luffy, but doesn’t voice his opinion out loud. He doesn't explain it but Luffy knows he doesn't want to ridicule Nami, not after she's taken their side in the argument - something Luffy heartily approves of. And if Usopp's tales still only include princes saving princesses, well, Luffy is sure they’ll find someone who can tell different ones.

 

* * *

 

Knowing Luffy’s priorities in life it’s a little surprising that it takes them as long as it does to find a cook for their crew. Luffy recognizes this too and while he definitely has a list of vacancies they’ve yet to fulfill – a musician is a must, at least – he’s more than satisfied with how things have gone so far. And after tasting his food, Luffy can fairly say that waiting for Sanji has been worth it, a concession made all the more impactful by his characteristic impatience, which also ensures he counts Sanji as a member of their crew far before the cook himself agrees to join them.

Luffy’s still in the process of cajoling Sanji into leaving Baratie to go with them when he’s distracted by Zoro’s fight with Mihawk. The others are pitching a fit over Nami leaving them but he’s not worried about her. She’d agreed to join and she’s the only navigator he’ll accept so whatever this is, he’ll fix it later. Zoro, on the other hand, is a more immediate concern, even if there’s really nothing he can do but sit and watch. Still, that has to count for something.

Zoro is certain he can answer the challenge and there is no stopping him. This is what he’s been training for ever since he could remember and he is not about to let the chance slip through his fingers. He’s ready, and not afraid. Luffy can feel his determination and excitement like waves crashing all over him and it’s both awe-inspiring and overwhelming. He pulls most of the way back from their mental link in order not to disrupt Zoro’s intense focus.

To achieve anything, you have to take risks, it's a simple truth Luffy's known all his life. And yet, when Mihawk stabs Zoro and then proceeds to cut him across the chest, Luffy feels the sharp sting of regret. _Is it not more important to protect your other half? Isn't the risk too much?_ He presses a hand to his own chest, alight with the ghost of Zoro's pain and thinks, _no_. But he's not sure he believes it.

 

* * *

 

In the end, of course, Sanji joins them. The rest of the crew isn’t there to witness it so Luffy conveys the news to Zoro who isn’t surprised in the least.

 _Are you still hurt?_ Luffy probes, more in a show of concern than an actual question because he knows the answer is _yes_ , but that Zoro will refuse to admit it.

 _Nah, I’ll be alright_. Despite his recent loss, Zoro is positively radiating good humor. _Don’t worry about me. I already said I’d never lose again, not to Mihawk, not to anyone_.

 _He called us a good team_ , Luffy ponders. He and Zoro are more than a team but nevertheless, he’s glad for the acknowledgment.

_You think he knows? That we’re like this… connected?_

_Who cares!_

He lets his happiness coil around Zoro like a snake basking in the warm sun and Zoro answers him with, _what are you so damn happy about_?

_Cause we have a cook now!_

_Ugh, don't contact me if you're going to think about him_ , and though there are traces of jealousy and disgust in that sentiment, Luffy can sense it's mostly in good humor. He never would've asked Sanji to join if he thought Zoro was genuinely opposed to the idea.

 _Now we just need Nami back and we'll be ready for the Grand Line_.

 _Easier said than done_ , Zoro remarks even though they're both fully confident that they'll succeed.

 

* * *

 

Once they leave Cocoyashi village, Luffy can finally be content that their crew is whole and ready for new adventures. Sanji, for his part, doesn't seem to care much about him and Zoro - busy being preoccupied with Nami, especially after everything that happened with Arlong. Nami stands the attention begrudgingly. A few times Luffy thinks he catches Sanji looking their way, about to say something, but he always retreats before actually voicing a thing. Luffy would interfere if he thought it was a genuine problem but he doesn't think it is. Sanji and Zoro get along destructively, like a house on fire, and Luffy lets them be.

"He wants to make fun of us," Zoro points out one day when they're lounging on the deck, Sanji serving refreshments and side-eyeing them sitting there, so close to each other there’s not an inch of space between them from shoulder to knee.

"Huh? Why would he make fun of us?" Luffy asks, oblivious.

Zoro looks down at him, pokes around his head for a moment - an almost physical feeling that makes Luffy all jittery, but in the best way possible. "You really have no idea," Zoro concludes in an amused tone.

"What is it, Zoro?" He whines, stretching the last vowel of Zoro's name like it's a rubber band.

"He wants to mock me, for taking it up the ass or something. But he can't because he actually likes you."

Luffy blinks at him innocently, closes his eyes and tries to fish for the meaning in Zoro's mind instead of his words. It's elusive like Zoro is purposefully keeping it from him. He could probably get to it if he tried hard enough, but if Zoro doesn't want to share it now, he'll do it when he's ready. Luffy lets it slip out of his grasp and pouts, wondering if it's worth it to disentangle himself from Zoro's side just to get another snack from Sanji who seems disinclined to approach them when they're like this.

"We'll get to it when we get to it," Zoro says and, while not entirely sure about the specifics of _it_ , Luffy agrees. They'll get to it eventually, whatever it is. For now, it's a mystery.


	2. Chapter 2

They arrive in Logue Town and Luffy is overly excited - which is saying something when being exuberant is his default setting. Zoro listens to him prattle on about the pirate king, both inside his head and outside of it. To him, none of it holds much significance, but he can feel the anticipation in the rest of the crew as well, each and every one of them looking forward to the Grand Line. This is the beginning of something new and a departure from all things familiar is looming ahead of them, inevitable like the change of seasons.  
  
Usually, Zoro wouldn't classify himself as superstitious, but when Luffy announces his plan to explore the execution platform where Gold Roger met his his end, with so much eagerness in his voice, Zoro can't help but find it ominous. No pirate should be so enthusiastic to catch a glimpse of a place like that - it seems like courting bad luck. Navy is not kind to pirates, he should know, he's spent years hunting the very thing he has now, unexpectedly, become. It's not something he wishes to dwell on, but he can't ignore the part of his brain that says it's possible, even likely, that one day it'll be one of them up there, looking down at the world one last time. If it comes to that, he hopes it's him. Because he will do anything in his power to make sure it’s not Luffy.  
   
He lets Luffy dash along, this is clearly the kind of personal quest that Zoro's best not interfering in. He wants to tell Luffy to be careful but knows it'd be ignored. He sets out on a mission of his own, he’s hardly going to be able to protect Luffy with just one sword, especially not in a town teeming with outlaws and marines. Although Luffy would probably deny any need for protection, there’s no question in Zoro’s mind that he will find trouble long before they’re off the island. And when that happens he’s determined to be there, wielding three swords, whether he’s welcome or not.

He doesn’t get very far before a commotion yanks him out of his musings. There's a dark-haired woman standing in the street, being harassed by two larger men. Zoro immediately tenses, his body primed for a fight, knowing that even lacking two of his swords he'd be able to wipe the floor - or in this case, ground - with common thugs like these. However, before he has time to make a move, the woman has unsheathed her blade and cut both of them down in swift, precise motions. He's a little impressed, perhaps because she doesn’t look like much, but he can see potential in her. That is, at least, before she stumbles and drops her glasses, trying to blindly fumble for them on her knees in the dust. He picks up the glasses and hands them over to her. She lifts her head but her “Thank you!” is drowned out by the roaring in his ears when he takes in her face.

 _It's Kuina!_ That’s the first thing his mind supplies him with and he almost blurts it out loud, only just holding back and saving himself from looking like a crazy man. And he’d have to be crazy to have entertained, even for a moment, the possibility of Kuina still being alive. Hadn’t he seen the corpse? He banishes the image from his mind violently, clinging desperately to the one delusional bit of hope that, undeserving as he is, he's been granted a miracle.

His heart thumps against his ribcage painfully and Luffy rushes to him through the bond. _What's wrong, Zoro?_ He doesn't know why right then, but he feels it low and weak, a tendril of something stretching towards her - and her tentative response.

 _Who is this?_ Luffy asks, eternally curious.

Zoro is taken aback. _You can sense her too?_ He doesn't think it's supposed to be possible. He himself can hardly sense her yet, the bond but a seconds old fledgling between them.

But Luffy's mirth is palpable. _You found another one!  
_

He feels Luffy stretching towards the newly formed connection and just knows if he touches it, it'll seal it in place permanently. It's too much, too fast, and too personal as well. This stranger with a sword and Kuina's fierce expression makes him feel long-buried feelings even Luffy hasn't managed to dig out of him. He panics, and without thinking slams close all the doors to his mind and for the first time since that day in Shells town, blocks Luffy from his mind.

It’s rash, he knows, and he regrets it almost immediately but keeps his mind closed. The woman in front of him is staring, she doesn't seem to have any idea of anything out of the ordinary having happened between them, as blind to the bond as to the world around her. Well, it's unlikely she has any prior experience with such things anyway, he surmises, most people don’t.

“Are you alright?” She asks, arranging her glasses back on. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

Her observation is so eerily accurate he’s tempted to laugh, except he’s afraid it’d come out as a sob and he’d rather hang on to some remnants of his dignity.

“What’s your name?” is all he manages to choke out as a response. He has to hear it even if he already knows the answer won’t be what he wants it to be.

“I’m Tashigi, from the marine base,” she offers, and after a pause adds, “And you?”

Marines? That's a thing he needs in his life like the plague.

“No one important,” he says, already turning his back on her.

 

* * *

 

He ends up running away without saying goodbye. Looking at her is painful and he has more pressing obligations to both himself and his crew. He's heard it said that you can't run from your soulmates, that you're bonded for a reason and you can only stretch the bond so far before it pulls you back together. That you're destined to always run into each other when you share a mind. But he's going to damn well try.  
  
It doesn’t take him long to find a shop that sells swords, but even the short walk is enough to allow his feelings to switch from disappointment to irritation over this "Tashigi" character daring to look and act so much like someone she’s not. He's not going to allow her to steal something that was supposed to remain between him and Kuina.  
  
He shakes his head, deciding to put the whole incident out his mind - and steps into the shop.  
  
“I want to buy some swords,” he announces to the shop owner whose initial cheer dies down in record speed when he hears the details of Zoro’s meager budget. He’s not been too worried since, after all, he can do more with a regular sword than many can achieve with a tailor-made one. Yet when the shop owner lays his grabby hands on his one remaining sword and starts offering increasingly large sums for it, Zoro can feel his earlier irritation creeping back. What is it with this cursed town that insists on reminding him about his past life every corner he turns? It's been ages since anyone's even looked at his inherited sword twice.  
  
Just then another figure stumbles next to him, reaching for his sword. “This is Wado Ichimonji, isn’t it?” She asks, oblivious to the rest of the world.  
   
She's so absorbed by the sword and her little sword catalogue that she doesn't even notice Zoro, yet he can’t help but notice her. It's almost uncanny how of all places in a city of this size she has managed to find him as if she's been following an invisible trail only she can sense. Whatever animosity he’s felt towards her suddenly feels trivial, and the moment her hands touch the sword a wave of relief crashes over him. There’s no definite reason for it, just a vague sense that the sword is in the hands of someone worthy. Zoro rarely lets others touch it and even now he wants to snatch it away, make it crystal clear to everyone in the shop that the sword is and will forever remain in his possession. He only restrains himself because she starts spouting more details about the blade. Was Kuina's sword that special? To him, of course, but worth so much? He's a little stunned by the realization.

When the shop owner finally accepts that Zoro’s not about to sell his sword he begrudgingly directs him to the corner that holds the bargain swords. Tashigi joins him, having finally managed to tear her eyes away from his sword long enough to look at his face. He sighs and proceeds to rummage through the barrels filled with damaged second-hand swords until his hand fits around the handle of one that's calling to him. It feels different from the others, with a heavy presence. He pulls it out and the girl looks like she's about to piss her pants. "That's the great Sandai Kitetsu! You should get that!"  
  
“I can’t sell that sword to you!” The shop owner retorts.  
  
“Why not?” asks Tashigi, but Zoro already knows.  
  
“It’s a cursed sword, right?” he says, and it’s not a question. He stares at the blade with an uncanny feeling of something staring back, assessing him. It doesn’t take him long to come up with a solution. "Let's see which wins, the curse or my luck"  
   
It's not a conscious decision per se, just something that feels right. He swings the sword in the air and stretches out his arm, placing it in the sword's path. He feels entirely, utterly calm. Eyes closed he waits for the verdict and when the sword touches his arm on its way down he's not sure if he's been cut or not. If he had, he thinks this is how it would feel at first, just the cool kiss of steel on his arm and nothing else. When the weapon is sharp enough the body is slow to register any damage.  
   
Fortunately, he’s still got both of his arms when he opens his eyes. Saves him the trouble of learning to fight one-handed and explaining any missing limbs to the crew. The blade itself is embedded deep in the floorboards of the building as if to ensure him it could’ve cut off his arm ten times over had it chosen to. There is no way he’s leaving without it, no, he’d steal it if need be.

As it turns out, there's no need for stealing. He walks out with not one, but two free swords, courtesy of the owner that's suddenly warmed up to him after his stunt. _Perhaps my luck is turning_ , he concludes, _didn't even have to spend any of the money I borrowed from Nami._

 

* * *

 

He's sitting on the steps at a square when he opens his mind back to Luffy. It doesn't take long for him to show up, looking a bit sheepish but not angry, Zoro notices, relieved. He’s always ready for a fight, but never with Luffy.

"What are you doing here?" He asks though it’s obvious Luffy’s there for him.

Luffy shrugs. "I got lost."

Zoro doesn't believe that for a second but lets it go. Neither of them may have the greatest sense of direction but they're always able to find their way to each other.

 _I’m sorry for… you know_ , he thinks at Luffy, some things easier left unsaid. They haven't exactly created a code for what to keep secret from each other or how to even accomplish privacy in their situation.

Luffy cocks his head to the side in an expression of confusion. _Why sorry?_

Zoro lowers his head but can’t help grinning down at the pavement. _Things are so simple with you, even when they’re not._

_Isn’t that a good thing?_

He raises his gaze, smiles at Luffy - it really is hard to not smile at Luffy - and says out loud. “The best.”

"That's a cool looking sword," Luffy observes but inside his head it's all about, _tell me, tell me, tell me about her!_

Zoro sighs and shows him. Shows him the dark hair and Kuina's face, a slim yet tough frame of roughly 5'7" made of attitude and kindness. He shows him her dedication and passion for soldier's path that may rival Kuina's, but also how she's clumsy in a way Kuina'd never have been. How she knows so much about swords but not necessarily anything about the real world. He shows how she reminds him painfully of what he's lost - like the world is mocking him, giving him this second rate consolation price he didn't ask for, would never ask for.

"Let's ask her to join the crew!" Luffy announces, at least half-serious.

Zoro makes a face. "Like hell, we will! She's just a copycat and worse, a marine!"

"Zoro!" Luffy admonishes but then adds more kindly, "It’s not her fault. Maybe you should give her a chance."

Zoro knows Luffy’s right, but his feelings aren’t coming from a rational place. This is something he has to process more slowly, with enough time and reflection. That’s one fundamental difference between him and Luffy, he’s not capable of adjusting to new situations in a blink of an eye, not when those situations don’t relate to swordsmanship. It's disturbing enough, realizing how many details about the girl he's gleaned just from two brief encounters.

 _Enough of this topic_ , he thinks while rising to his feet. “Go see your thing yet?”

“Nope! There’s no hurry.”

Those are big words coming from Luffy and Zoro can’t help but feel a warmth spread all over him thinking that Luffy who’d been absolutely insistent in the morning has judged Zoro a priority over his latest whimsy.

“Good. I better come with you anyway,” he grumbles, careful not to let any of his mushy feelings leak through to Luffy.

He may not be entirely successful, but Luffy doesn’t mention it. Simply laughs, claps him on the shoulder and announces, "let's get lunch!"

 

* * *

 

Of course, they end up getting separated - not because either of them takes the wrong turn or anything, no, it’s simply because it’s virtually impossible to keep up with Luffy when he sets his mind to something.

He's too slow catching up, having to be guided by Sanji of all people. It's something Zoro blames himself for because he really should've known earlier, had, in fact, had reservations just about this, but he hadn’t realized the true danger before he is standing there, looking straight at Luffy, trapped on the platform. Luffy, who doesn't look scared, actually isn't scared, as Zoro confirms through their link. He's just... lying there, laughing in the face of death and Zoro knows he won't make it in time, but by gods does he try. He refuses to believe it could all end here, they were supposed to be so much more. He cuts through the crowd gathered into a tight herd to spectate the execution, the whole thing making him sick. _You think you’re so much better than pirates? Gathering here in expectation of murder?_ He can hear Luffy shouting his name across the square, but even he doesn’t believe it’ll do any good, that much is clear in the flow of regret and affection he sends towards Zoro.

_I'm glad I got to meet you. Even if it ends too soon._

It's a freak lightning strike that saves them, though Zoro has his doubts. Things like this don't just happen out of nowhere, it has something stupid like fate or destiny written all over it, he reckons but doesn't have a chance to examine that further. He's just so relieved that Luffy is okay. He doesn't get scared easily himself, stood unafraid against Mihawk. No, like Luffy, he's prepared to meet death head-on, with a grin on his face.

What he isn't ready for is seeing Luffy in harm’s way. The heavy weight of fear is unfamiliar and almost unbearable. He had not signed up for this when he'd made the decision to follow Luffy. Or he probably had, but is only reading the fine print in that contract now. Damnit. They run and run, to escape the marines, to escape that blasted platform, but his legs are weak and his chest feels tight. For a moment there he had known real terror, perhaps for the first time in his life. He's almost afraid he might do something stupid like cry if they weren't being chased by the navy itself. Luffy throws a worried glance towards him, no doubt sensing his uneasy emotional state.

 _I'm fine_ , he tries to reassure Luffy but of course, he isn't. They can't lie to each other.

 _We'll talk about it later_ , Luffy sends back.

 _Maybe I don't want to talk about it_ , he argues, stubborn. Luffy doesn't get a chance to answer because there, in the middle of the road stands the thorn in his side, Tashigi. She's brandishing her sword, Shigeru, the name of which strangely comes back to him despite only hearing it once in an off-hand comment from the shop keeper before.

"You tricked me!" She shouts. And he knows she's furious, can feel it pouring off of her. "You never told me who you were!"

He doesn't know if it's her feelings that make his control start to slip too, or his earlier shock over almost losing Luffy, probably both. Regardless of the reason, he's had enough of her.

"Go along," he tells the others and grabs his new swords. May as well give them a test ride.

They square off against each other in the middle of the street, Tashigi baring her teeth at him in rage. “I’m going to take Wadoichi from you!”  
  
And to her credit, she does give it a valiant try. Yet in the end, she’s hardly opponent enough to give his new blades a warm-up before he has her backed against the wall, weaponless and wearing a shocked look.  
  
“Whatever happens, I won’t give this sword to anyone,” he assures her and turns to leave. “I have to go now, bye.”  
  
He expects her to take offense at him considering her such a small threat that he doesn’t hesitate to turn his back towards her. However, she manages to once again surprise him.  
  
“Why don’t you kill me? Is it because I’m a woman?”

“I never liked you from the beginning!” he shouts back at her, aware that it’s not the most logical of answers but desperate to say anything to drown out the echo of Kuina's words from years ago. “Isn’t it enough that you have to act and look like my long lost friend? Now you gotta talk like her too?”

“What are you saying? I’m just being myself!” she snaps at him, moving closer, face only inches from his.  
  
“Well… stop it!” he snarls, suddenly aware of the regular marines gathered around them, regarding their fight like disapproving parents. The ridiculousness of the whole thing hits him and he sullenly mutters, “and leave me alone”, before breaking into a run down the road towards the harbor.  
  
Behind him, he can hear a few hurried steps before the unmistakable sounds of someone stumbling and hitting the wet ground hard. “As long as you have that sword,” Tashigi yells at him, undoubtedly covered in mud, “I’m never going to let you go!”

 

* * *

 

Once they're back on the ship, Zoro is finally able to put Kuina's doppelganger out of his mind. The Grand Line is looming ahead and they're all drunk on possibility and excitement. It's pouring rain and they've barely escaped with their lives. It's a moment for them as a crew, a unified whole and Zoro thinks, while they don't really know each other thoroughly yet, they aren't strangers anymore either. They all announce their goals to the howling wind and at that moment he's sure none of them doubt that they'll reach them. Nothing feels out of reach.

He feels Luffy's cold, rain-slicked hand entwine with his own and tug him towards the cabin. He goes without a word. They haphazardly dry themselves with towels that are shed on the floor with their wet clothes in messy piles that Nami would frown upon if she ever deigned to step inside this room. They tumble into bed together, hardly ever sleeping apart now, or even in the beginning when it was just the two of them on a small boat with the night sky as their ceiling. Luffy wraps himself around him, clingy as usual, and lets out a contented sigh. His skin is still cool from the outside and makes Zoro shiver.

"Today… Zoro was worried," Luffy muses.

Zoro throws an arm over his eyes, frustrated. He should've known better than to expect Luffy to fall asleep without first making Zoro suffer through this. Usually, Luffy lets his deeds speak for him, often doesn't seem to think at all, but his mind is not some echoing chamber filled with the cogwheels of a half-broken clock. He's much more observant than people give him credit for.

"Because you could've died!" He says, vehemently.

Luffy shifts, lifts his head enough to look Zoro in the eye even if it's almost too dark to see.

"Zoro," he says seriously, and sometimes he wonders if Luffy just enjoys saying his name out loud with the frequency he's using it.

That's when the cabin door slams open and both Usopp and Sanji rush in, dripping water all over the floor. They don't bother to turn on the light, just shuffle around in the darkness for what feels like an eternity before settling down into their bunks. Sharing sleeping quarters with the others is not ideal but at least he and Luffy are able to communicate silently. He'd rather die than have Sanji overhear some of the things they say to each other. Most of it is completely innocent of course, but Luffy can get seriously mushy and Zoro has an image to maintain.

Luffy snuffles into his neck, cold nose pressing against his pulse point. _I won't die_ , he promises. 

 _You can't know that._ He grits his teeth, his sensei's words from so long ago, the morning of Kuina's death, echoing in his head: _humans are such fragile beings_.

_You promised you'd never lose again,_ Luffy reminds him. 

_Yeah, and…?_

_I promise I won't die, not before I reach my goal, the same as Zoro._

As if it were that simple. But he can't easily argue the logic, not when he'd made such a pompous claim himself. Believing in Luffy is the easiest thing in the world, but he regrets that even Luffy isn't naive or hopeful enough to promise he'd _never_ die. That, of course, is ridiculous, everybody dies at some point, but it doesn't stop him from wishing Luffy might find a way to escape death, somehow. 

He's just starting to feel Luffy's mind drift to sleep when he's yanked back to alertness by a relentless mantra of _I lost, I lost, I lost_.

 _What is she doing? In the middle of the night?_ Zoro wonders, and then, _why can I hear her?_

 _Because_ , comes Luffy's drowsy response, _she's thinking about you._

Zoro feels a headache building at the back of his skull. Just having Luffy inside his head is often overwhelming, but now he has to share it with another?

 _Can she hear us?_ He thinks worried. Being bonded to a marine could be real trouble if she’s able to track them through the bond, or worse, find out their plans in advance.

Luffy just hums noncommittally. _Ask her._

 _How?_ This bond with her does not come naturally, not like the one with Luffy.

_Reach out_ , Luffy instructs him, like it’s the simplest thing in the world.

_I only know how to reach out to you. Idiot._

Luffy's everywhere in his mind, bright and encompassing. Trying to track down the tiny stream leading to Tashigi is like trying to locate an insect in your field of vision while looking straight at the sun. Impossible. He's too blinded by Luffy's presence to get there. But he doesn't have to rely on just his own lacking capabilities anymore, Luffy hones in on the girl like a hawk, so adeptly it's almost frightening.

 _Here_ , they think in tandem even though it’s really Luffy leading Zoro. He closes his eyes and hangs on to the feeling of his whole being entwined with Luffy's and senses an unfamiliar presence invading the place he'd only ever wanted to share with his captain. It's like he's suddenly slipped inside her head, too effortlessly, and he knows it's only possible because of something Luffy did. He feels what she feels, the cold night air and the combination of rain and wind whipping her face, obscuring her view in the darkness lighted only by a few lonely lanterns. She's at the sea, the deck below her feet swaying in the waves but her feet are firmly planted, with no hint of her previous clumsiness. Well, she's a marine, after all, they're meant for the sea like pirates are, he supposes. She's holding on to a practice sword with both hands, the wooden handle slippery with rainwater and sweat, forcing her to grip it almost painfully tight and affecting the smoothness of her strikes. She's working through a series of suburi in a punishing speed.

 _I lost to him, he tricked me, I'll show him,_ she chants in her head and Zoro is almost sorry he's inspired this level of fervour in her.

 _Hello?_ Luffy sends her way and she falters, stops and turns to look over her shoulder.

 _I don't think she's realized about the bond yet,_ Zoro guesses. She can't tell the difference between listening with her ears and listening with her mind. He's about to suggest they pull back when he hears a door creak.

"What in the seven hells are you doing outside in the middle of the night, Tashigi?" Booms a man's voice across the deck.

"Captain Smoker! N-nothing, I couldn't sleep because of the storm…"

Smoker looks at her intently. "Bullshit. You're all worked up because of Roronoa." Somehow he manages to lit a cigarette despite the weather and puffs out a cloud of smoke. "I don't care. Get into bed and save your energy for tomorrow, sergeant."

"Yes, sir!" She salutes him and hurries inside, still clutching onto her wooden sword.

They lose the link, perhaps thanks to Luffy, or it's just not strong enough yet to maintain for longer. Zoro stares into the darkness, listening to Usopp's snores and the gentle _tap tap tap_ of rain hitting their ship. It's less heavy now, less heavy than wherever Tashigi is. So even if they're following they're not too close behind, thankfully.

 _I like her_ , Luffy cheerfully tells him.

_Well, I don't. She's meddling in stuff that's none of her business._

_Heh. I wonder what mine's like?_

_Your what?_ Sometimes Luffy's mind bounces around like it, too, is made of rubber.

_The other person I'm connected to, like you and Tashigi.  
_

_You know, finding even one is rare as hell, but two? I bet the chances are astronomical._

_I'll find them! I won't lose to Zoro!_

_It's not a damn competition,_ he wants to say but knows it'll fall on deaf ears. Luffy is vibrating with excitement now, his earlier drowsiness swiped away completely. Zoro is ready to fall asleep, hasn’t had even a moment for his customary nap all day and there's too much he doesn't want to think about tonight. _Go to sleep, Luffy._

_But I'm not tired!  
_

Experimentally, he wraps his mind around Luffy's thinking sleepy thoughts. Takes a page from Tashigi's book and chants _calm, calm, calm_ in what's more of an impression, a concept, than actual words. It's not something he's tried before but it works. In less than a minute he's got an armful of dozing Luffy drooling on his chest and he can't help but smirk and let himself sink into a peaceful shared dream.

**Author's Note:**

> The title is from Edith Södergran:
> 
> “It would be easy and simple for the pure of heart  
> to follow happiness’s tracks,  
> but our souls could only shiver.  
> For one who has seen the dirt in joy’s brief spring  
> there remains nothing  
> but to freeze hotly to death”


End file.
